Two Loves, Armageddon (Chapter Four)

Chapter 4
The Bullet

We drove. Perceptions of life, perceptions of what we had, they make it seem like something more than the landscapes that pass under a steady horizon. The cityscape tore up through the horizon and left it smoldering on the ground. Sara’s hand rested on mine, which grasped the smooth leather and metal of the shift stick.
I hate trust, it seams like love, it is bound to be thus. But for a chance to believe in something concrete and not just abstract we hold it close and seek its vulnerable warmth.
From high overhanging trees, rays of light adorned the car. The sun waned and our hearts anxiously fluttered as our ambitions yielded to the draining cold of our dark destiny. The ground was still warm with the radiance of the days heat, but its blanket was filled with holes and the immediate realization of such sent chills down our spines, whilst goose bumps sprouted in the night on dry skin.

Often times and emotional freefall is more settling than the roller coaster of hope’s misleading manifestation.

Every second the sky grew gloomier. I drove without a mind behind closed eyes. Somewhere else I lay in silence, bubbling a brew of thoughts, racing from one end of the room to the other. I thought of my life. My life before the unfurling that took place here. I drew a very simple picture. For the first time I contemplated that I had wished for humanity such a fate. Perhaps I longed for this, dreamed that one day such adventure would permeate my life like the heroes in movies.
We approached a large apartment complex. It felt unfamiliar, but I told myself it was my brothers and I had been here a thousand times before. The building cast a ominous shadow along the causeway. Pulling up to the front door, I slowed the corvette to a complete stop. The murmur of the engine and the stillness of the air felt like a sweet change, but the shattered glass security door at the front entrance pierced like the bitter truth.
I told Sara to hop over the driver’s seat as I exited the car to take a look inside. I approached the door stepping carefully over shards of glass. In the back of my mind I anticipated it. However I still was astonished as a hand that rested on the floor protruding from the security guard’s led to an arm, and a mangled corpse. Brutally mutilated, the security guard’s body was a bloody reminder of what had become of society. Two eyes glared aimlessly at me from a melted face. A missing nose led up to visible eyebrow bones, where eyelids were no longer discernable.
I stepped over the corpse to grab a ring of master keys. Proceeding down the hall, every door had been kicked in and every room lay not unlike a urban battlefield. Each key on the ring I held lost its purpose with each door I passed. Some rooms showed traces of their original inhabitants, some appeared to be fresh with squatter movement and inside other piles of ash and flesh lay smoldering.
The stairwell, the entrance to the second floor, my brothers floor, the same sight I had seen just below. I dropped the keys and retraced my steps. Reverting my path, I had no desire to see a relatives corpse, nor any to sulk in such past images that would notoriously invade my senses. His door was kicked in and sounds of hate filled the narrow corridor. I would risk no further.

Tow aimlessly and you may never arrive . Tow without a destination and you arrival will be marked simply by the lay of the land. Neither trumps its counterpart, but to the individual one is king and the other a servant’s quarters.

I exited the parasite infested structure. I returned to the car. Took the driver’s seat, and looked into the eyes of my passengers, and saw their compassion. However, I needed none. For myself I reserved no hope for the world and facades outside the car. Nevertheless I felt a wave of warmth from the thought of such human understanding.
I close my eyes, clenched all the lose skin on my face between my cheeks and eyebrows, and release letting the blood slowly return. I opened them again and allowed the car to slowly gain speed as it was swallowed by the abyss of night.

Take a ride on emotion and feel the sheets on the king’s bed.